Church (and some other odds and ends)

So, I haven't really had a true "home church" since I was in high school. Mostly my fault and fear of commitment from some not so great experiences at churches. However, I deeply desire that type of community and fellowship to be involved in. And I'm just finding it sort of difficult. I'm not always sure why either. I think sometimes I'm overly critical of churches when attempting to be discerning. I am also finding it difficult to find a place in a church as a single adult. Some churches have no singles in their congregation and pay little attention to ministering to singles (which is fine - some churches have no need to do this) and others put so much focus on having a huge singles group that they are nearly a seperate entity from the church and there is very little integration with the rest of the church body and there is much lack of community because the group is so huge. Its hard to find a church with a balance. I seek a church that is doctrinely sound, its focus is completely on God and furthering the Kingdom, of moderate size, has a reasonable variety of ministries within and outside the church and the singles group (like any other group seeking to minister to people at a certain station in life) seeks to minister within itself as well as being fully integrated in the rest of the church body. I also don't want the singles group to be eharmony.com. While I think church is an optimal place to meet those of the opposite sex, I feel that singles groups are often "meat markets". I just feel that churches don't know what to do with their singles and singles don't know how to integrate within the church.

Thats just been my experience for the most part thus far. That, or the church is very far away from my house and impractical to be involved in more than just on Sundays or whatever. So what is the answer to this problem? Does anyone know of any churches for me to try? I tried a church with my sweet friend, Amy Sistrunk. It was good. Slightly more charismatic than I prefer, but still good. I'd be open to giving it some more chances. Amy said there was a small group of young singles there as well, so thats promising.

Anyways, this weekend has been okay. Its been nice to have my dad home, alhtough it was short. He came home from Brazil yesterday morning at 5:30 and left for Portugal this afternoon at 2:30. My poor daddy. Hopefully that will be the last of the traveling for at least a few weeks. We basically just ran around and did random stuff all weekend. I'm really praying for a close group of friends to do things on the weekends with so I don't feel like there is nothing to do but hang out with my parents. They are fun and all but I'd really like to have my own adult life seperate from my parents. So maybe in a month or two, I won't be spending my entire weekends with just my parents. We shall see.

I've really been struggling with a sense of purposelessness lately. I graduate with my Masters in December and have no idea where to go with it. My internship is okay but I feel that so much of it is caught up in running across the city, filling out obscene amounts of paperwork and making sure you are doing eveyrthing legal that the personal touch and connection often gets lost. I just don't know if I could love a job like that despite all the good it does for children and families. I know I'm passionate about that population, but I don't know if being an EIS (early intervention specialist) is how I want to serve them. I'm also passionate about a million other things, so its hard to choose what to pursue. I am so blessed to have the education that I do, but what do I do with that blessing that I've been given? Not only am I feeling purposeless in the long-term realm, but also the short-term realm. I only have my internship 3 days a week and am off for the other two. I applied to substitute in Cy-Fair but that won't be for another three weeks or so. So what do I do with the time off I've been given? I can only facebook/blog stalk and read for so long. I go on walks with Ella. I have no money to spend. So what should I do? How does God want me to use this time off?

I am very sad that my Baylor Bears did not beat those silly Aggies this weekend. But I can't say I'm really surprised. They did hold on well until the last quarter, so thats good I guess. Some year will be the year of the Bear. I hope its not when I'm 100.

Okay, this post has been way long enough. I'm off to get ready for bed. Have a great week! God bless!