I was reading Kimberly's blog earlier today about how the Lord was teaching her about obedience. And it got me thinking about my present situation and decisions that need to be made.
One thing she said that God was teaching her was that, "Serving God out of love and not obligation or fear is of the utmost importance."
I'm wondering if I am trying to make my decisions because I fear God or feel some sort of obligation. I honestly do want to serve Him because I am so deep in love with Him. But am I using that as the motivating factor in my life?
I'm not really sure, to tell you the truth.
And that's rather unfortunate. Serving Him out of love is such a basic and elementary truth to faith, yet applying it doesn't seem to be for me. I am constantly afraid that I am going to make the wrong decision and move myself to the wrong place doing the wrong thing.
I wonder if I focused more on making my decisions because I love Him as opposed to fearing Him, if my decisions would be much easier. I'm pretty much betting they would.
On the topic of making decisions, here's the latest update. I am probably going up to Colorado Springs at the end of this month to meet with the people up there. Human resources is supposed to be sending me a packet to fill out, but I have yet to receive that. One agency in Houston was interested in me, but the lady who I am in contact with is out of the office until next week (she failed to tell me this 2 weeks ago), so we'll see where that goes. Another Houston agency said they didn't have any availability for an intern, but wished me lucked in my endeavors. I emailed two more agencies in Houston today and within 5 minutes, one had emailed me back and told me they were very interested. The building that I would be working in is 5 minutes from my dad's office. We could carpool and do lunch. Now I know most of you are wondering why I am emailing so many more agencies in Houston than Colorado Springs, but there is good reason for that. Houston is so big that instead of just one large agency serving the area, several agencies have divided up the area (by zip code).
So, basically pray that God's will be made clear to me and that I am willing to follow that will, not out of obligation or fear, but purely because I love Him and have faith in Him and His plans for my life.
On a funny note, I took Ella to Petsmart today to get groomed. Its a very costly service, but very worth it. They give her a bath, brushing, de-shedding, nail clipping, ear cleaning and tooth brushing. I guess $45 is a good price for all of that because most of it I can't do on my own. However, Ella hates going there. You would think being a girl, she would love going to get her hair and nails done, but not so with her. The poor girl who was in charge of Ella's grooming services said that they got all the fur out that they could (it was covering the floor of the place - who said getting a Siberian Husky was a good idea?) but she had gotten very upset towards the end. Also, more than anything, Ella hates having her nails clipped. I used to try to do it, my brother tried it and my dad tried it, but to no avail. I thought surely Petsmart could do it. Again, to no avail. They said Ella was throwing herself off the table to avoid getting her nails clipped. So that didn't get done. She's a mess. I love her anyways, but good grief. What am I going to do with this child? I secretly think that God is preparing me for my own kids someday and this is quite a taste of that! Holy moly.
And thats not all. She is going to be so upset with me. On Thursday, I have to take her back to the vet (it's next door to the grooming place) where she will have a checkup, which includes a heartworm test. She is going to be soooo mad! I think I'll buy her some ice cream from Sonic afterwards. I'm such a sucker.
Anyways, God bless and again, stay dry! When will this rain ever stop??? I keep driving over the Lake Lewisville bridge and I think its going to cover over I35 pretty soon here. That will be quite the disaster.
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