Painting Pictures of Egypt
by Sarah Groves
I don’t want to leave here
I don’t want to stay
It feels like pinching to me either way
The places I long for the most
Are the places where I’ve been
They are calling after me like a long lost friend
It’s not about losing faith
It’s not about trust
It’s all about comfortable
When you move so much
The place I was wasn’t perfect
But I had found a way to live
It wasn’t milk or honey
But then neither is this
CHORUS:
I’ve been painting pictures of Egypt
Leaving out what it lacked
The future seems so hard
And I want to go back
But the places that used to fit me
Cannot hold the things I"ve learned
And those roads closed off to me
While my back was turned
The past is so tangible
I know it by heart
Familiar things are never easy to discard
I was dying for some freedom
But now I hesitate to go
Caught between the promise
And the things I know
BRIDGE:
If it comes too quick
I may not recognize it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?
If it comes too quick
I may not appreciate it
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?
So I usually don't like putting song lyrics up here. But this was sung for us last night at church at our wonderful Pastor's request because it directly applies (and is actually inspired by) what we are talking about in church now as we walk through Exodus.
I can't even begin to explain to you how much this song is about my life and where I've been and where I'm going. And the faulty mindset that this song so aptly describes about God moving us. I'm not much of a crier most of the time, but as this song was sung for us last night, my eyes just filled with tears because I knew I have been exactly where those Israelites were in their thought patterns. I think I might have sobbed had I not been holding it together because I wasn't able to sit by my girlfriends last night and was sitting next to a really cute guy (I know him, but not super well - certainly not well enough to sob in front of).
Anyways, just wanted to share how the Lord spoke to my heart as of late. Here's a link to the youtube video of this song...I promise it won't be a waste of your time to listen to it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSXciv06218&feature=related
Monday, June 30, 2008
Friday, June 27, 2008
Remembering the Lettuce Wrap
Today, my mom and I decided to eat lunch at Chili's. Her and I are both attempting to lose weight with Weight Watchers and although Chili's might not seem like a good place to go for losing weight, it has salads that we both like and fit in our diet plans. My salad happens to be lettuce wraps and I have been eating them for years. Well when I opened my menu (even though I know what I am going to get, I still like to look at the menu...weird, I know), I couldn't find my beloved lettuce wraps anywhere.
When our waitress came up, I asked her where the lettuce wraps were. She told me that they are taking them off the menus! The horror! However, she said it was a recent change and that they might still have the ingredients to make them if I wanted them. They did, so today, I enjoyed my very last lettuce wraps.
Now this might seem like a silly thing to blog about, but you have to know that if you have ever dieted and eaten out, you know that it is hard to find things beside dry grilled chicken that fit within your diet plan. Lettuce wraps were one of those non-threatening, guilt free items that I truly enjoyed and didn't feel like I was eating diet food when I ate them. And they were at one of my favorite restaurants. But apparently, not enough people shared my love for them and the lettuce was going bad, therefore making Chili's lose money.
And I like to blog about silly random things, so this fit in perfectly. Join with me as we say adios to the lettuce wraps!
And a more serious post is on it's way...not sure what it will be about, but I have a lot of thoughts swimming around in my head, so one of those thoughts will eventually make its way onto the pages of my blog.
God bless!
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Your Thoughts Please...
I love to blog stalk. Not gonna lie. I love to read about lives I know little or nothing about. I came across this blog. This girl recently got married, but has sensitivity for those of us who are still waiting for a God-fearing man to walk into our lives and sweep us off our feet. I found this quote on her blog today in a post:
“Why do we pray for women who want to have children, but can’t or haven’t yet, to have open wombs. But for women who want to be married, we pray that they would be content in their singleness. Why don’t we pray that God would bring them a man of God and start their family?”
It was actually a quote from a friend of hers, but she was relaying the conversation.
What are y'alls thoughts? I'm not sure how I feel about it. I want to agree with it because as most of you know, getting married is a deep desire of my heart. Just like those women who are having difficulty conceiving have a deep desire in their heart to have children and be a mother.
So why do we ask the single women to be content in their singlehood but don't ask the married but childless women to be content in their station as life as well? Isn't that somewhat of a double standard?
However, shouldn't we be praying for peace and contenment wherever we are at, no matter the pain we sometimes feel in any of those situations? They are different kinds of hurts, but hurts all the same. I don't know. Since I've never experienced the inability to conceive or lost a baby to a miscarriage, disease or whatever the case may be, I can't really comment on it. But I can comment on the singlehood. It hurts sometimes. Sometimes, the hurt is more than sometimes - it is a lot of the time. It depends on the day.
Anyways. Let me know what you think. Some of you are married and aren't thinking about children. Some of you are married and have children or will very soon. Some of you are in my exact position. I really do want to hear your thoughts.
God bless!
“Why do we pray for women who want to have children, but can’t or haven’t yet, to have open wombs. But for women who want to be married, we pray that they would be content in their singleness. Why don’t we pray that God would bring them a man of God and start their family?”
It was actually a quote from a friend of hers, but she was relaying the conversation.
What are y'alls thoughts? I'm not sure how I feel about it. I want to agree with it because as most of you know, getting married is a deep desire of my heart. Just like those women who are having difficulty conceiving have a deep desire in their heart to have children and be a mother.
So why do we ask the single women to be content in their singlehood but don't ask the married but childless women to be content in their station as life as well? Isn't that somewhat of a double standard?
However, shouldn't we be praying for peace and contenment wherever we are at, no matter the pain we sometimes feel in any of those situations? They are different kinds of hurts, but hurts all the same. I don't know. Since I've never experienced the inability to conceive or lost a baby to a miscarriage, disease or whatever the case may be, I can't really comment on it. But I can comment on the singlehood. It hurts sometimes. Sometimes, the hurt is more than sometimes - it is a lot of the time. It depends on the day.
Anyways. Let me know what you think. Some of you are married and aren't thinking about children. Some of you are married and have children or will very soon. Some of you are in my exact position. I really do want to hear your thoughts.
God bless!
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Everybody Dance Now!
Hello all! My new job and various activities outside of work have kept me so busy that I just simply have not had the time to visit blog land to update.
For those that don't know, I have spent the past week and a half teaching dance/creative movement/physical fitness at a nonprofit organization that exposes children with disabilities to performing and visual arts. Whoever thought I had the credentials for this job must have been crazy because I spend most of my days wondering how I got this job and why they pay me to do it. I don't feel like I know what I am doing but I am slowly learning. Too bad I only have 4 more weeks of camp to get it right. I'll probably get it right the last week. Anyways.
So yeah. I definitely can tell I was meant to be an elementary teacher. All (well, let's be honest - some/most) of the activities I plan work great with my younger classes (I have 4). They get into it and I am able to fill the whole hour of class without too many lapses in time with nothing to do except go crazy and run around my smallish dance room. However, my older classes (ages 12-19) look at me as if I am crazy half the time and just stare at me. What on earth am I going to do with them? All they want to do is play volleyball. And that is definitely not what I am being paid for. I tried Little Sally Walker with them today and they stared at me like I had asked them to run around naked. Big time failure. So anyone have any ideas? Seriously. I feel like I am dying in that class. And not only that - the girl who this organization was started for is a volunteer in my class and reports to all my bosses what is happening and which teachers she likes and does not like and what she thinks they should be doing (she is 15 and somewhat thinks she runs the place - sweet girl, just kind of a big head). Today she told our Artistic Director that she should fire the music teacher (who is great IMO) who has been teaching at the organization faithfully for like 6 or 7 years. Geesh.
Anyways, enough about work. I must sleep now and pray that tomorrow is not as big of a failure as today was (every class went fairly poorly). Outside of work, I have just been getting ready for my real job that starts in August, doing church stuff, trying to have a social life before it ends in August and my real job consumes me and just hanging out with the family.
Next post should be more interesting. Seriously, if you have any ideas for any of my age groups (I have classes from ages 5 all the way up to 19), please please please comment. I've done a lot so far but don't want to get in a rut just doing the same things over and over (especially because a lot of the kids are repeats).
God bless!
For those that don't know, I have spent the past week and a half teaching dance/creative movement/physical fitness at a nonprofit organization that exposes children with disabilities to performing and visual arts. Whoever thought I had the credentials for this job must have been crazy because I spend most of my days wondering how I got this job and why they pay me to do it. I don't feel like I know what I am doing but I am slowly learning. Too bad I only have 4 more weeks of camp to get it right. I'll probably get it right the last week. Anyways.
So yeah. I definitely can tell I was meant to be an elementary teacher. All (well, let's be honest - some/most) of the activities I plan work great with my younger classes (I have 4). They get into it and I am able to fill the whole hour of class without too many lapses in time with nothing to do except go crazy and run around my smallish dance room. However, my older classes (ages 12-19) look at me as if I am crazy half the time and just stare at me. What on earth am I going to do with them? All they want to do is play volleyball. And that is definitely not what I am being paid for. I tried Little Sally Walker with them today and they stared at me like I had asked them to run around naked. Big time failure. So anyone have any ideas? Seriously. I feel like I am dying in that class. And not only that - the girl who this organization was started for is a volunteer in my class and reports to all my bosses what is happening and which teachers she likes and does not like and what she thinks they should be doing (she is 15 and somewhat thinks she runs the place - sweet girl, just kind of a big head). Today she told our Artistic Director that she should fire the music teacher (who is great IMO) who has been teaching at the organization faithfully for like 6 or 7 years. Geesh.
Anyways, enough about work. I must sleep now and pray that tomorrow is not as big of a failure as today was (every class went fairly poorly). Outside of work, I have just been getting ready for my real job that starts in August, doing church stuff, trying to have a social life before it ends in August and my real job consumes me and just hanging out with the family.
Next post should be more interesting. Seriously, if you have any ideas for any of my age groups (I have classes from ages 5 all the way up to 19), please please please comment. I've done a lot so far but don't want to get in a rut just doing the same things over and over (especially because a lot of the kids are repeats).
God bless!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Personal Training
You know, I used to think that personal training was only for wealthy suburban women who had way too much time on their hands and were overly invested in their looks and appearances.
However, my skepticism has slowly faded and I now have joined the ranks of those who have a personal trainer.
I have several reasons that I decided to do this. One, I really just needed the accountability and focus that personal training provides. Yes, I could have found this in a friend or something, but all my friends live in other areas of town and it would be fairly difficult to coordinate schedules, work out places and times. I work out with my dad a lot, but he is really really fit and motivated to be so, so it is hard to compare to him when you lack the same zeal for working out that he has. Also, his schedule and my schedule often clash, so being consistent would be hard.
I really just feel that doing this now is a wise investment for my future. The older I get, the harder it will become to get back in shape, so why not set a good pattern and develop positive lifestyle habits early on? They will teach me how to safely and effectively exercise my body and muscles and I can take those recommendations and such with me and carry them even after my period of personal training is over. Also, if I take care of myself, I will be healthy for my future husband, children and so forth so that I can care for them and give to them the best I can. I don't want to take away from them because I am bogged down with health problems that I could have prevented by a healthy lifestyle and good choices.
Also, honestly, I want to lose some weight (15-20 lbs.) and look good. I know that is silly and somewhat vain, but seriously, what girl doesn't want to look her best? I have the rest of my life to be chunky, so if it is attainable to look decent now, why not try? I probably will be curvy/a little plump later in life because every woman in my family is and struggles to no avail with a sluggish metabolism.
So there you have it. Personal training is hard for me and sometimes just flat out miserable, but I keep reminding myself how good it is for my body and of all the reasons I listed above.
I also know I am not the only girl doing this. Several girls in my Bible study class are doing this as well and several more have expressed interest. So at least I am in good company.
God bless!
However, my skepticism has slowly faded and I now have joined the ranks of those who have a personal trainer.
I have several reasons that I decided to do this. One, I really just needed the accountability and focus that personal training provides. Yes, I could have found this in a friend or something, but all my friends live in other areas of town and it would be fairly difficult to coordinate schedules, work out places and times. I work out with my dad a lot, but he is really really fit and motivated to be so, so it is hard to compare to him when you lack the same zeal for working out that he has. Also, his schedule and my schedule often clash, so being consistent would be hard.
I really just feel that doing this now is a wise investment for my future. The older I get, the harder it will become to get back in shape, so why not set a good pattern and develop positive lifestyle habits early on? They will teach me how to safely and effectively exercise my body and muscles and I can take those recommendations and such with me and carry them even after my period of personal training is over. Also, if I take care of myself, I will be healthy for my future husband, children and so forth so that I can care for them and give to them the best I can. I don't want to take away from them because I am bogged down with health problems that I could have prevented by a healthy lifestyle and good choices.
Also, honestly, I want to lose some weight (15-20 lbs.) and look good. I know that is silly and somewhat vain, but seriously, what girl doesn't want to look her best? I have the rest of my life to be chunky, so if it is attainable to look decent now, why not try? I probably will be curvy/a little plump later in life because every woman in my family is and struggles to no avail with a sluggish metabolism.
So there you have it. Personal training is hard for me and sometimes just flat out miserable, but I keep reminding myself how good it is for my body and of all the reasons I listed above.
I also know I am not the only girl doing this. Several girls in my Bible study class are doing this as well and several more have expressed interest. So at least I am in good company.
God bless!
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
The Post with ADD
Since I have been not so diligent in my posting lately, I now present you with a post about a million things that is all over the place. So hang in there...
Marjie's Engagement (and everyone else in the world)
My sweet cousin got engaged. Her Australian fiance (hot accent!) proposed to her on an island in Honduras while on a trip with friends. How great is that!?! Anyways, so excited and I will have my dancing shoes ready for next May! (Don't worry, Paul - she told me it would the end of May, so I should be able to come to your wedding!)
Summer Job
So, I don't know if I mentioned it before, but God blessed me with a really amazing summer job. It is at this local non profit organization that provides performing and visual arts education to children with disabilities, illnesses and who are economically disadvantaged. Every summer, they run 6 weeks of day camp (2 weeks in June, 3 weeks in July and 1 week in August). I originally applied just to be a teacher's aide in their dance/creative movement class, but they shocked me when they asked me to be the actual teaching artist in there! So I get to make up all the dances, activities, etc. for all these sweet kids that are so dear to my heart. I also didn't expect to make much money at all since it is an npo, but I asked my salary after being hired and I had to ask them to repeat it when they told me - $25.00 per hour! Holy moly. That's almost as much as I will be making teaching full time next year. I am a little overwhelmed and feeling inadequate for this position, but am super excited and have really been getting into my lesson planning - I already have 2 weeks done!
Missions
I desparately wanted to go on a missions trip this summer. I was certain that was what God wanted out of me. But, as usual, His ways are bigger and greater than my ways (PTL for that - amen!) and I have just felt this really strong "NO" being spoken to my heart for this summer. I was very disappointed. I wanted to go to Cuba. I wanted to go to Kenya. However, as soon as I made a movement towards one or the other, I just felt this deeply unsettling feeling in my hear that I couldn't shake. So I said no. Interestingly enough, as soon as I did that, God dropped an unexpected but exciting opportunity in my lap. Every year, my church does this 5 day project at different sites around the city, partnering with local churches located in poorer neighborhoods and helping them to connect with the neighborhood and minister to those living there. Well, I ended up being asked to be the VBS coordinator for our site. VBS is the thing that everything else that is going on centers around, as I understand it (that's what they told me anyways). So yeah. Again, overwhelmed and feeling inadequate, but am so so so excited about this opportunity! So even though I don't get to serve overseas, I get to serve in my own city to people who are in desparate situations and desparately need the love of Jesus in their lives. I think I underestimate the importance and neccessity of stateside missions, so I think in my trying to serve and teach these precious little ones, they will teach me even more.
Mom's Health
Many have asked for an update on her, so here it is. She is actually doing pretty well. She went to see one of her doctors yesterday and he told her that he never would have guessed that she had been through what she had been through by the way she looked and stuff. Anyways, when she was discharged from the hospital, she was put on home oxgen for 24 hours a day. Which meant we tugged around oxygen tanks anytime we went out and the machine was always running when we were at home (however, it actually kind of has a calming sound - like a fan would - it helped my dad sleep!). On Monday, she went to the pulmonologist and he told her that she could be oxygen free! Yay! So things are looking up. She will have weekly appointments and blood tests for about the next 6 months, but that isn't that bad. So thanks for your prayers - they were definitely felt in a difficult and scary situation. Just pray that she starts and continues to take better care of herself than she has been in the past few years.
Ella
Ella is doing well. Yesterday, she ate 5 peanut butter chocolate chip cookies and part of a peanut butter cake. I think she was miffed that I had been gone all day and not playing with her. That is the only time she counter surfs - that stuff had been sitting up there for a week untouched by her. She is very excited about a new addition to the family soon. My parents are adopting a golden retriever very soon. His name is Lance (after Berkman and Armstrong - two family favorites). He is currently staying at his foster parents' home because he is undergoing heartworm treatment (which requires much rest and quietness - not possible when living with Ella!) and will be having his "surgery" on Friday. Poor guy. Anyways, he should be here in about 2-3 weeks, so Ella is very excited to have a friend again! I think she misses Gibson a lot.
Okay, I think I have tortured you enough for today. I will update again and try to get the Japan pictures up eventually. Sorry for the delay. Love you all! God bless!
Marjie's Engagement (and everyone else in the world)
My sweet cousin got engaged. Her Australian fiance (hot accent!) proposed to her on an island in Honduras while on a trip with friends. How great is that!?! Anyways, so excited and I will have my dancing shoes ready for next May! (Don't worry, Paul - she told me it would the end of May, so I should be able to come to your wedding!)
Summer Job
So, I don't know if I mentioned it before, but God blessed me with a really amazing summer job. It is at this local non profit organization that provides performing and visual arts education to children with disabilities, illnesses and who are economically disadvantaged. Every summer, they run 6 weeks of day camp (2 weeks in June, 3 weeks in July and 1 week in August). I originally applied just to be a teacher's aide in their dance/creative movement class, but they shocked me when they asked me to be the actual teaching artist in there! So I get to make up all the dances, activities, etc. for all these sweet kids that are so dear to my heart. I also didn't expect to make much money at all since it is an npo, but I asked my salary after being hired and I had to ask them to repeat it when they told me - $25.00 per hour! Holy moly. That's almost as much as I will be making teaching full time next year. I am a little overwhelmed and feeling inadequate for this position, but am super excited and have really been getting into my lesson planning - I already have 2 weeks done!
Missions
I desparately wanted to go on a missions trip this summer. I was certain that was what God wanted out of me. But, as usual, His ways are bigger and greater than my ways (PTL for that - amen!) and I have just felt this really strong "NO" being spoken to my heart for this summer. I was very disappointed. I wanted to go to Cuba. I wanted to go to Kenya. However, as soon as I made a movement towards one or the other, I just felt this deeply unsettling feeling in my hear that I couldn't shake. So I said no. Interestingly enough, as soon as I did that, God dropped an unexpected but exciting opportunity in my lap. Every year, my church does this 5 day project at different sites around the city, partnering with local churches located in poorer neighborhoods and helping them to connect with the neighborhood and minister to those living there. Well, I ended up being asked to be the VBS coordinator for our site. VBS is the thing that everything else that is going on centers around, as I understand it (that's what they told me anyways). So yeah. Again, overwhelmed and feeling inadequate, but am so so so excited about this opportunity! So even though I don't get to serve overseas, I get to serve in my own city to people who are in desparate situations and desparately need the love of Jesus in their lives. I think I underestimate the importance and neccessity of stateside missions, so I think in my trying to serve and teach these precious little ones, they will teach me even more.
Mom's Health
Many have asked for an update on her, so here it is. She is actually doing pretty well. She went to see one of her doctors yesterday and he told her that he never would have guessed that she had been through what she had been through by the way she looked and stuff. Anyways, when she was discharged from the hospital, she was put on home oxgen for 24 hours a day. Which meant we tugged around oxygen tanks anytime we went out and the machine was always running when we were at home (however, it actually kind of has a calming sound - like a fan would - it helped my dad sleep!). On Monday, she went to the pulmonologist and he told her that she could be oxygen free! Yay! So things are looking up. She will have weekly appointments and blood tests for about the next 6 months, but that isn't that bad. So thanks for your prayers - they were definitely felt in a difficult and scary situation. Just pray that she starts and continues to take better care of herself than she has been in the past few years.
Ella
Ella is doing well. Yesterday, she ate 5 peanut butter chocolate chip cookies and part of a peanut butter cake. I think she was miffed that I had been gone all day and not playing with her. That is the only time she counter surfs - that stuff had been sitting up there for a week untouched by her. She is very excited about a new addition to the family soon. My parents are adopting a golden retriever very soon. His name is Lance (after Berkman and Armstrong - two family favorites). He is currently staying at his foster parents' home because he is undergoing heartworm treatment (which requires much rest and quietness - not possible when living with Ella!) and will be having his "surgery" on Friday. Poor guy. Anyways, he should be here in about 2-3 weeks, so Ella is very excited to have a friend again! I think she misses Gibson a lot.
Okay, I think I have tortured you enough for today. I will update again and try to get the Japan pictures up eventually. Sorry for the delay. Love you all! God bless!
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